2007 June « Secrets Of The Nurse Healers, A Blog, By Kate Loving Shenk

Illness Is A Great Teacher

The first part of our lives, we come to learn the ways of the world.

The second part is spent unlearning.

Some of us are faster learners than others, and unlearners.
The trick is to remember the unlearning because if you don’t, you
get stuck in delusion.

For instance, I’ll use the example of illness, one of the Big Ones.

We learn early on to have an aversion to getting sick.

Yet we may get more attention, people take care of us, we may get
to stay by ourselves to contemplate the delirious thoughts rumbling
round and round in our heads.

Most recently, I was in bed with a fever of 103 degrees. I used “The
Work” of Byron Katie and Ho’oponopono to heal my thoughts about the
illness.

Ho’oponopono is an ancient Hawaiian healing technique that simply
requires the inner chanting of four phrases: I love you, Thank you,
Please forgive me, (for the part I played in bringing about this
“problem”), I am sorry (for the part I played).

Byron Katie’s “The Work” is a process where a “problem” is scrutinized
with Inquiry, or a series of questions, that puts the responsibility
right back where it belongs–inside yourself.

The 4 questions of Byron Katie’s “The Work”

1) Is it true?

2) Can you absolutely know for sure that it’s true?

3) How do you react when you think that thought?

4) Who would I be without that thought?

—and turn it around—

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

I awoke at 3 a.m. one morning with fever and said to myself: “I feel terrible.”

“The Work” began to immediately flow through me, as if called by the
Creative Source.

Is this true?

Yes, it is true.

Can I absolutely know without that it is true?

Yes, without doubt.

How do I react when I think the thought: I feel terrible?

Well, I create a story of how terrible I feel, how frustrated I am because
the fever won’t break, how I want to do other things but can’t. I just am not
enjoying myself.

Who would I be without the thought: I feel terrible?

I’d just be me, lying in bed with a fever, turning to look out the window,
witnessing hundreds of lightening bugs blinking majestically there,
like a mid-year Christmas light display.

I’d just be lying here saying: Thank you body, thank you fever;

I love you body, I love you fever; I’m sorry and forgive me for the part
I played in bringing about this illness.

Turn it around?

I don’t feel terrible.

I feel enlivened.

I feel like the inner fire of the fever is changing me forever.

I feel like the fever is the gateway to transformation.

I feel like the fever gave me this opportunity to spontaneously
use “The Work” without even trying to use it and that “The Work” was
using me.

Ho’oponopono effortlessly flowed through me like music to my soul.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

I was sick a few days after that, but didn’t complain to people about my illness,
didn’t want to, thus did not create a story that would make people say,
“Poor you.”

I didn’t have to dramatize the illness with a Poor me, martyr complex that
takes longer to undo than it’s worth.

I got to simply be sick, listen to thunderstorms, and the rain gently falling on
the vibrant green of summer.

I got to lie with my dogs who leaned over to lick my nose, every now and then.

Now THAT is a little bit of heaven!

-=-=-=-=-=-=–=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Kate Loving Shenk is a writer, healer, musician and the creator
of the e-book called “Transform Your Nursing Career and Discover
Your Calling and Destiny.” The book is designed to stimulate
nurses to love their work and to prevent on-the-job-burnout.
Click here to find out how to order the e-book:
http://www.nursingcareertransformation.com
Check out Kate’s Blog: http://nursehealers.typepad.com
http://mukunda22.powerfulintentions.com
http://secretsofthenursehealers.wordpress.com
And the Lens: http://www.squidoo.com/katelovingshenk
http://www.squidoo.com/thinkriches
http://www.mukunda22.powerfulintentions.com/forum/thinkandgrowrich
http://progressives4pennsylvania.blogspot.com
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Published in:

on June 29, 2007 at 12:37 pm Leave a Comment

What You Can Learn From Criticism

Having to be right is a national pastime.

We all do it. We feel like we’re in control when we fall into
the illusion of having to be right.

The need to be the smartest person in the room stems from the
need to be right, correct and in control.

Because of this peculiarity, none of us likes to be criticized.

My mother used to say: It’s not what you say, but how you say it.

But she didn’t like to be criticized, either.

In recovery circles, we take an inventory of the wrongs we
have committed, the resentments we’ve held. Then, in order to
take 100% responsibility, we see the part we played in the
encountered difficulties, and when appropriate, go to the persons
we have harmed, and apologize.

We get to be wrong. They get to be right.

This is a lesson in humility.

Sometimes, people criticize in an abrasive and upsetting manner,
and we tell the story that we’ve been verbally abused.

When the old feathers get ruffled, this offers the opportunity
to practice Ho’oponopono incessantly, to erase the memory of
discomfort, and also to practice “The Work” of Byron Katie.

Byron Katie’s “The Work” is a process where a “problem” is scrutinized
with Inquiry, or a series of questions, that puts the responsibility
right back where it belongs–inside yourself.

If you want to hear compliments, or you want people to agree with you,
go directly to your friends, or to the people who like you.

Growth is minimal in those encounters (although a compliment can
be the catalyst for great insight).

The teenagers and partners you live with, or the person you think is an enemy:
these are the people who lay it out, and nine times out of ten, won’t
always be kind in their appraisal of you.

This is a perfect time to continue the Ho’oponopono chants and go inward
for peace of mind.

Looking back over my life, any criticism I have ever received has been correct.
At the time, I didn’t like what I heard.

I said, “How dare she say that to me?”

Then during the 4th and 5th step inventory, I saw the part I played, took 100%
responsibility, made amends, felt immediate relief, and could go on as
a free-er human being.

The 4 questions of Byron Katie’s “The Work”

1) Is it true?

2) Can you absolutely know for sure that it’s true?

3) How do you react when you think that thought?

4) Who would I be without that thought?

—and turn it around—

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

The Mini-Judge-Your-Neighbor-Worksheet

I am angry at my writing instructor because she said I need to be more
specific in my writing.

I need my writing instructor to re-evaluate her criticism and give me an
“A” for my essay.

My writing instructor should see that I far surpass all of the other
students in the class and I should get an “A”.

My writing instructor is an idiot.

UNDERLYING FEARS:

I fear that my writing instructor thinks I am a bad writer and
that she is right!

I fear that I can’t excel in what I love (my writing) and that I am a failure.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

My writing instructor shouldn’t tell me to be more specific in my writing.

Is this true?

Yes, because I am specific in my writing.

Can you absolutely know that this is true?

Well, no.

How do I react when I think the thought, “My writing teacher shouldn’t tell
me to be more specific in my writing?”

I feel uptight and exposed. I am afraid she is telling the truth.

What truth is that?

That I am a bad writer.

How do I react when I think the thought that I am a bad writer?

I feel miserable, sad and feel like crying.

Who would I be without the thought that I am a bad writer?

I would write for the pure joy of writing and not care what anyone
else thinks about it.

Turn it around?

I’m not a bad writer.

My writing teacher should tell me to be more specific in my writing.

Why?

Because that’s what writing teachers do; give constructive criticism.

I need to tell myself that I am a good writer AND be conscious of being
more specific in my writing.

UNDERLYING BELIEFS

Criticism is bad.

When someone criticizes me, I am exposed as a bad person.

I have to pretend that I am perfect.

1) Criticism is bad.

Is this true?

No.

Turn it around?

Criticism is good. It serves as an avenue for self-growth.

2) When someone criticizes me, I am exposed as a bad person.

Is this true?

No.

Turn it around?

When someone criticizes me, I can find the truth within the criticism,
and become a better person than I was before.

3) I have to pretend to be a perfect person.

Is this true?

No.

Turn it around?

I no longer have to pretend. I can be ME, and love myself and everyone else
without shoulds, without the need to be perfect.

I can love my flaws and everyone else’s flaws.

When I find myself resisting honest criticism, I can tell myself:
What I defend against is the truth I don’t want to face.

Then I continue my Ho’oponopono practice to clean and erase all memory
of past suffering brought on by the need to be perfect or to be
the smartest person in the room.

The need for perfection, to be right are examples of stress that lead to war,
abuse and violence.

Turn it around?

I don’t need to be perfect or right in order to be happy, here and now.

I don’t need a story.

I don’t need a personal history.

The world is mine exactly as it is.

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Published in:

on June 22, 2007 at 11:01 am Leave a Comment

Unexamined Assumptions

Recently, I decided to meditate on a situation that happened 34
years ago, where I had so far failed to forgive a person who killed
8 of my dogs.

I practiced the ancient Hawaiian healing art to erase and clean
the memory by ceaselessly and silently chanting: I love you,
Thank you, Please forgive me, (for the part I played in this situation),
and I am sorry (for the part I played).

One day I received a gift. I wrote a note to Byron Katie International,
asking what I needed to do to become certified in “The Work” of Byron Katie.

A few days later, I noticed I was placed on a “round robin” group of
Byron Katie graduates of the 9 day intensive “the school.” The idea
is that every month we pair up with a different graduate and do Inquiry
with our designated partner.

I was excited by this opportunity! Even though I’m not a graduate of
“the school,” I didn’t have time to be intimidated by that, because my partner
and I arranged to do the process of Inquiry the next day.

I’ve seen You Tube videos of people who are in the middle of taking the
life changing nine day course. They couldn’t find words to describe
the experience they were having. They reminded me of people having a peak
spiritual/religious experience, without drugs.

They looked like they had been to the mountain top: they appeared radiant,
free, ecstatic.

I prepared for this opportunity by filling out the Judge-Your-Neighbor worksheet,
found in all of Byron Katie’s books, and on her websites and blog.

THE 4 QUESTION AND TURNAROUND

1) Is it true?

2) (If the answer is “yes”): Can you absolutely know that this is true?

3) How do you react when you think that thought?

4) Who would you be without that thought?

And turn it around.

I. I am still angry at my neighbor because he shot 8 of my dogs 34 years ago.
His name is John Barley.

While I writing this out, I suddenly realized that I don’t know if John Barley
was the person who shot my dogs.

I never saw who actually did these acts. It could have been a son, nephew
or daughter, or his wife.

For 34 years, I assumed John Barley killed my dogs because all my friends
who lived with me told me he was the one who did it.

But did he really do it?

I told my partner about this revelation the next day on the phone. We were 3500
miles and 3 hours removed, yet “the work” brought us together in a timeless orb
of transformation.

I held a deep resentment towards a person for 34 years, going over and over
the crime in my mind like an unending movie frame, creating a story,
a drama, a scenario that everyone agrees who hears it: isn’t that terrible?
How did you survive? He is a terrible person!

I am angry at my neighbor because he shot my dogs.

Is this true?

Well I am angry but he probably wasn’t the one who really shot the dogs.

Here the story, brought to the scrutiny of Inquiry, begins to unravel.

How do I react when I think the thought, that I am still angry at my neighbor
for killing my eight dogs?

I feel constricted and judgmental, yet have a sense that I don’t want to
carry this around anymore.

I am relieved that the light of Inquiry makes assumptions seem laughable and
inconsequential.

Is there a stress free reason to keep this thought?

No, never is.

Who would I be without the thought, that i am still angry at my neighbor
for killing my dogs?

I would be a person who sees that people commit atrocities, mass genocide,
wage wars, and they kill dogs. From this perspective, I let it go.

Turn it around?

I am no longer angry (at whom ever did it) for killing my dogs.

I am not angry at my self for having this belief because I don’t need to
beat myself up.

The dogs aren’t angry because they were killed. Dogs take death fully in stride.
They live in the present moment.

They know how to love unconditionally.

So I choose to be more like my dogs!!!

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

My partner had an issue he needed to gain clarity on, so we did “the
work” on it.

I am happy to report that my first try at doing this process went well.

My partner gained a level of insight he needed to make a major decision in his life.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

When I take 100% responsibility for everything that has happened in my life,
the old and tired assumptions fall away. They serve only one purpose: to stay
stuck in a vibrational field of judgment and victim-hood.

The unexamined life is not worth living, said Henry David Thoreau.

Unexamined thoughts, assumptions and stories that hold you prisoner don’t
hold the key to your happiness.

The life-line is available.

Find a way, and use it.

Published in:

on June 15, 2007 at 11:14 am Leave a Comment

Medicine Without Borders

As we excitedly wait for film maker Michael Moore’s new
masterpiece,”Sicko,” I decided to do some research on Cuba’s
health care system.

“Sicko” spotlights the negligent U.S. health care system.
In a brilliant example of contrast, Moore takes 911 fire fighters and
rescue workers with life threatening lung problems their
health insurance policies refused to cover, first to
the U.S. Post Guantanamo Bay in Cuba, where
care was refused; then to Havana, where the doctors there
happily treated them.

50,000 people are without health care insurance in the
United States. Many of those who are insured are under
insured. The job of the insurance companies
is to deny claims and services to their clients, whether
they admit it, or not.

According to Health Care Now, the U.S. ranked 58 in the
provision of health care worldwide. More than 50% of American
bankruptcies are the result of inability to pay for medical emergencies.

The United States has aggressively attempted and
consistently failed to destroy the communist government of
Fidel Castro, most recently through an ongoing blockade of
goods and services into that country.

Due to the pressure the U.S. has exerted on other
countries to stop their trade with Cuba, Cuba has been
forced to request higher prices for goods and services,
including medicine. In one year, Cuba had to pay
an extra 45 million dollars for pharmaceuticals, which is
80% to 140% more than other buyers of medicine, according
to Medi-Cuba, the Cuban firm that imports medicine
and human technology.

Nevertheless, Cuba continues to offer free and
comprehensive health care to all her citizens.

In addition, since 1963, Cuba has exported its exemplary
health care service around the world, sending doctors and its own
technological advancements in medicine to countries throughout
Latin America and Africa.

Cuba provided much needed medical support after the 2005
earthquake in Kashmir, Pakistan. Fidel Castro offered to
lend medical support after the devastation following
Hurricane Katrina. Medical Personnel were packed and ready to go.

Unfortunately, the U.S. chose to play politics over the
saving of lives.

EXPORTING HEALTH CARE

Cuba trains international students at its medical schools.
After Hurricane George and Mitch plummeted Central America and the
Caribbean, Cuban Doctors rushed to the disaster zone, as was their
practice for similar acts of Mother Nature.

When it was time to go back to Cuba, the team of doctors saw a need for
posting doctors in several of these countries in order to
train local people in medicine.

Thus the Havana-based Latin American School of Medicine or
ELAM, was born, offering $10,000 scholarships for free medical training.

The Program has grown to 22,000 students from Latin
America, the Caribbean, Africa, Asia and the United States. The students attend
ELAM and 28 other medical schools across Cuba. The students represent all
ethnic groups, 51% are women, and they come from 30 countries.

A young person from inner city Bronx who chooses to
take part in this program, for instance, must promise to take
her expertise back to the neighborhood she came from.

350,000 people now work in the health care field in Cuba,
serving a population of 11 million people. Everyone has access
to doctors, nurses, specialists and medicines. A doctor and
nurse team oversees every neighborhood.

House calls are routine. The wisdom of treating a patient
holistically, knowing a patient’s family and her environment,
is crucial to successful treatment.

Doctors and nurses in Cuba are trained in acupuncture,
herbal treatments, massage and other natural health modalities, as well,
something lacking in American health care.

The exportation of Cuban health care is a Peace Project
that we all can learn from.

Before Cuba sent doctors to Pakistan, relations between
these two countries were not harmonious. But now, the relationship
is “magnificent,” says Dr Ceballos, a Cuban physician.

The investments in health care missions “are resources that
prevent confrontation with other nations,” Dr Ceballos explains.
“The solidarity with Cuba has restrained aggressions of all kinds.”

And in a statement that acknowledges Cuba’s vulnerabilities
on the global stage, Dr. Ceballos explains, “It’s infinitely
better to invest in peace than to invest in war.”

A SINGLE PAYER PLAN IN PENNSYLVANIA

“Family and Business Health care Security Act of 2007″ is
a single payer health care plan currently being set forth
in the state of Pennsylvania where I live.
It may prove to be the prototype health care plan for every
state in the union.

Michael Moore’s “Sicko” has opened the debate. Now we must
get active and change the world.

Published in:

on June 9, 2007 at 9:58 am Leave a Comment

Who Are You After You Drop Your Story?

I am sitting with my deep blue Irises on this perfect
spring morning and I inwardly chant: Thank you, I love you dear
Irises for showing me the meaning of beauty and transcendence
here on planet Earth.

Human concerns and problems are nonexistent as I continue
my Ho’oponopono chant.

If an issue suddenly surfaces in the form of a memory or
an actual seemingly troubling event, I continue the chant, adding: I
am sorry, Please forgive me for the part I played or play in
bringing this story about.

Ho’oponopono is an ancient Hawaiian healing art that
teaches that by inwardly saying the phrases, I love you,
Thank you, I am sorry, Please forgive me, that shared memories and mental
repetitive tapes are erased.

These chants are ceaselessly repeated even in calm and
peaceful times, as I sit with my Irises and love them.

The phrases are a direct method of Letting Go/Letting God.
Ho’oponopono teaches that everything we see is a projection of our
emotional baggage and programs or of our love and harmony.

The choice is ours: to let go, to embrace, or react and
get lost in the confusion.

The challenge is: that everyone loves a story. Our
earliest programming for most of us is the bedtime story. Children
love these and we love to read them and tell them.

In my own life, the stories that seemingly happen such as:
The doctor was mean to me; The patient is homeless; my love affair
is over; she doesn’t love me anymore; he loves her more than he
loves me; are the same stories that happen to everyone.

New stories don’t exist. They’ve been rehashed for
hundreds and hundreds of years!

Ho’oponopono is a beautiful tool. As I inwardly chant my
phrases (I love you, Thank you, Please forgive me and I am sorry) I also use
Byron Katie’s “The Work” to dissect my stories and grant
them the freedom to be–or not to be.

I will use as an example a volatile situation that occured
in the workplace:

A provider does not respond to a call of an imminent delivery. The
nurses deliver the baby and when the provider arrives, she screams
at the nurses in front of the patient. The delivery was smooth,
baby was healthy, and mom was very happy, indeed.

I will use the Judge-Your-Neighbor Worksheet to do “the work”
for this particular story:

Inquiry: The Four Questions and Turnaround

1) Is it true?

2) Can you absolutely know that it’s true?

3) How do you react when you believe that thought?

4) Who would you be without that thought?
and–

Turn it around.

I. I am angry and frustrated with said provider because she
screamed at me in front of the patient. She has done this on
numerous occasions and we are all sick of it.

Is this true?

Yes.

Can you absolutely know that it’s true?

Yes. (Well, she really doesn’t do it all the time….)

How do you react when you believe that thought?

Judgmental and restricted.

Who would you be without that thought?

I’d be more relaxed and allow others the freedom to be themselves
without me having to be freaked out and offended.

(Here I can see that my thoughts and beliefs are what are
bringing me pain–not what anyone else does or doesn’t do!!)

Turn it around: I am not angry and frustrated with this person.

I am angry and frustrated at myself because I allowed someone
else’s behavior ruin my day.

I may not always be totally centered and caring for my
patients–How can I improve that?

II. I want (said provider) to take a communications class and get her
act together.

Is this true?

Well, not necessarily true.

Who would you be without this thought?

I’d think it was funnier and could laugh at it and move on.

Turn it around.

I don’t want her to take a communications class. What she does or
doesn’t do is her own business.

I need to take a communications class.

In fact, I want to take a communications class!

III. Said provider should get her medicines re-evaluated.

Is This true?

No, because I don’t even know if she is taking any medicines.

Who would you be without this thought?

More clear, more forgiving.

Turn it around.

Said provider should not get her medicines re-evaluated.

I need to get MY medicines re-evaluated!!! (Just kidding–I don’t
take any medicines but if I keep going insane with these judgments, I may
have to see a Doctor!!!)

IV. What do they need to do for me to be happy?

Stop screaming at nurses in front of patients.

Is this true?

No, because if this is what I base my happiness on, I will never be happy.

Why?

Because people will always be screaming at nurses in front of patients,
will continue to do so, and this is the way of it.

How do I know this? Because it continues to happen. Could even happen today.

Turn it around.

She doesn’t need to stop screaming at patients for me to happy.

I need to stop screaming at my self and stop thinking the world
needs to change for me to be happy.

V. What do you think of said provider?

1) Not fun to be around

2) Psychologically impaired.

3) She is mean-spirited.

Is this true?

No, she’s may be having a bad day.

Turn it around–

I’M not fun to be around when I judge other people.

I’m fun to be around when I don’t judge other people.

I’m psychologically impaired when I judge other people.

I’m psychologically sane when I don’t judge other people.

I am mean spirited when I judge other people.

I am kind when I don’t judge other people.

VI. What is it I don’t want to experience with this person again?

I don’t ever want to be in a situation where I am screamed at in
front of a patient, or screamed at ever again, under any
circumstance.

Is this true?

No, I see the absurdity of this, now.

Turn it around?

I do want to be screamed at–Why? Because the reality is,
people scream at each other. (And when other people scream at me,
I am given the opportunity to up my Ho’oponopono practice!!)

I look forward to other people screaming at me, because I can clean, clean
and erase with the tools of Ho’oponopono.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

Ho’oponopono and The Work are examples of taking 100% responsibility.

Issues in the form of memory of shared human anguish arise and we clear,
erase and do the the work of Inquiry.

What would you be without your story?

I know I’d be closer to spirit, closer to the infinite, and I’d be a happy person.

Published in:

on June 1, 2007 at 7:20 am Leave a Comment

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Secrets Of The Nurse Healers, A Blog, By Kate Loving Shenk

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Illness Is A Great Teacher

What You Can Learn From Criticism

Unexamined Assumptions

Medicine Without Borders

Who Are You After You Drop Your Story?

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